Coping with death

[pressure]

i hope this goes in here

how do you cope with death??

[NATAL!E]

I'm graudally learning.

It's really not nice.

Crying my heart out. Talking to people.. My friends.. Boring them to insanity about how I feel, and my memories and how I don't think I can cope.

It's a tough thing to come to terms with really. But. I think I'm slowly getting better..

It really hits you hard when it's someone you love so much. Your life feels like it's never going to be the same again.

But everything is solved with time. I guess..

[pressure]

time is a bitch

the days will get longer and longer !!!

[xxrachxx]

yep it is hard, i had an aunty of mine die, a couple of week before christmas, i was upset in college, but i had mi mates there, it took a few days, but yeh time does gradually help heal ya

[Shane]

Different people deal with different things in different ways.
If it is someone really close to you that has died then it will be a harder blow on you then if some distant relative you had onyl seen a couple of times died.

Do whatever you feel will let you vent any stress or anger you feel, talking to people about it is usually the best way to get it all out and if you feel like you need to cry then do so.

[pressure]

crying is all im doin for more than one reason

its times like u need ur mates, family or partner around
i only see my maes when im at college and even i cnt cry coz il get sent home, my family are the other reason i cnt talk to them and my bf wnt even talk to me

[Bob!]

One of me work mates has just been diagnosed wi cancer, lukemia.

He went into hospital the other week and is havin the chemotherapy stuff, where they pump shite into ya blood basically, makes hair fall out, go delusional an the lot.

He probably wont come out as they say he's got 10% chance of survival.




he's 21.


I hope he comes out ok even though theres a slim chance but, if not ya jus gotta keep goin, yer own life could end anytime, even before its really started, jus like his might do. I've had to cope with other family and friend deaths before but still theres nothin ya can do really. Just honor the life they had.

[pressure]

yeah

i know what u mean, my nan had cancer and she thinks she gettin it bk and my mum thinks shes got it, not very nice

[Luke]

I bottle it all up.

[OMGLIFESUX+1]

Ya nut the fuck up and get over it. Ain't no goddamn point crying about it. Ya take a day to a week and then get the fuck over it. There ain't no point in wasting something as valuable as life over a someone who is no longer alive

[Luke]

Ya nut the f*ck up and get over it. Ain't no goddamn point crying about it. Ya take a day to a week and then get the f*ck over it. There ain't no point in wasting something as valuable as life over a someone who is no longer alive

What a wanker.

[Bob!]

Forest speaks the truth.

Also fimily death is a thing all people face, and deal with it in different ways which is what this topic is about. However ya take it, in no way is it a good thing, so some people are going to take it hard, and its absoloutley understandable if they do.

[~*aussie_gal~*]

when i feel like sh*t because someone i love has passed i usually think about all the other people in the world suffering...or with people with the same problem... if its a parent that has passed think of all the never got to see there parents as they may have passed before they were old enough to remember them. you just need to talk to someone you love and trust do something in memory of them. it can even help to buy a pet. take up another hobby...some things to take your mind off it and when you think about it just think about all the memories and good time...

[Perfect_death]

my dad recently died of cancer and the worst thing was not him dying but watching him go through all the pain and treatment and everything for nothing because the hospital screwed everything up.
im coping ok i havnt broken down or nethin but my mum doesnt stop crying and keeps teling me that i dont care because im not in tears .but cos im not upset that doesnt make me a bad person does it??

[Number1]

I think talking to a loved on is the best thing get out all of ure emotions and then hopfully the horid fealings will go.
Do somthing to remember them? plant thier favorite flower and keep that alive just so that u can relate the deat to somthing and talk to it (it might seemm said but if u have no one it is a good thing to do)

[NATAL!E]

I am very self-contained when it comes to some things. I could talk pretty openly to my friends, but not really to any of my family.

Keeping things to myself made it easier in a way, because I could cry in my own company and not feel stupid infront of other people.

But I guess that's just me. =].

[iaxa]

im having troubles my grandma died on my b-day in tore me and my dad up alot.


Ya nut the f*ck up and get over it. Ain't no goddamn point crying about it. Ya take a day to a week and then get the f*ck over it. There ain't no point in wasting something as valuable as life over a someone who is no longer alive

you fking stooge okay you dont know how hard it is for some people to deal with this sort of thing you dickhead ... yeah you might wanna try years to get over it....

my grandad i watched him die of lung cancer ... that was when i was in year 1
my grandma died on my b-day
a friend just washed up on our shores naked yesterday

and im still getting over them okay it takes more than a lifetime to get over it okay u wanker (sorry about going off like that every1)

[Guest]

u go!!!!! i no wot u mean tho my best m8 is a guy and he thinks that i am pathetic cos im still upset bout my dad but i dont get y he thinks that i was really close to my dad and i had to watch the hospital fuck up all his operations!!!

he really pisses me off sumtimes!!

[Charley]

i cope with death in a number of ways i either talk to my close friends and family, or i write all my feelings down in a diary or something

[lozzy]

one of my friend dat i knew for 6 years died a few months ago when he was just 12, at first you cry your eyes out, i still do sometimes now but only occasionly, it gets better as time goes on, you'll never forget them, but remember they'll always be wit u and everyone dat loved n liked them.

[iaxa]

im having troubles my grandma died on my b-day in tore me and my dad up alot.



you fking stooge okay you dont know how hard it is for some people to deal with this sort of thing you dickhead ... yeah you might wanna try years to get over it....

my grandad i watched him die of lung cancer ... that was when i was in year 1
my grandma died on my b-day
a friend just washed up on our shores naked yesterday

and im still getting over them okay it takes more than a lifetime to get over it okay u wanker (sorry about going off like that every1)

well i guess that shut him up ...

[t-junction]

I've not read all the posts. But here are my two pennies.
Unusually, death does not effect me very much at all. Perhaps because I have not had anyone close to me die. My grandad's have popped their clogs, including the one I was quite close to. I was just, generally a bit 'Oh, he isnt here anymore' and wasnt what you would call upset. I suppose its because when we cry about death, we only cry for ourselves. The dead person is either in heaven having a whale of a time, or in hell (fairly unlikely though) or their existance has completely been eradicated in which case they feel nothing.
Sometimes I get annoyed with this because it means when people who I know have people die on them, I dont know what to say because I cant relate to them. Perhaps I am just heartless.

[lilsawa2oo6]

2 years ago on the 17th march a lad in my form at school died, it was tough on everyone, but that was when i really cried, ive never cried when my family has died, but this lad that passed away, id known since i was in early juniors. he was onli 15 an i think bout him evryday, lifes just started gettin easier for me, like everyones already said, everyone deals with death in a different way.

[Asi9ine]

I don't deal with it very well.

My ex girlfriend committed suicide about 2 months ago due to many things piling on top of her, and it's made me mildly delusional. Since then I have become attached to people who had similar qualities as her.

I think about it a lot, and I fear death. I have come close to it many times, and it's just the view of mine that makes me think that there's nothing after death that instills the fear.

[Lindsay]

grief is one of the weirdest things. it comes in so many different forms that its hard to give adivce on how to deal with it because everyone reacts differently.

A few friends of mine passed away last year and there is no real way to get through it. you kind of just have to go through the motions (denial, angry, sad etc) and lean on others around you for support.
After i got over the initial shock and hurt of it i made a scrapbook of the goodtimes i had with my friends so when i feel sad i can look at it and remember the happy times so it makes me feel closer to them, you know?
visiting their grave can make me feel better too, and remenising (sp?) with friends about them and talking about it makes the whole situation feel less lonely.

[Sponge'K'nob]

I can't cope, i really can't, i feel like im breaking down with no1 to help me. Its killing me.

[Tim]

well to take away the pain. u hav to think of all the gd times. because they are dead doesn't mean they are forgotten

[Sponge'K'nob]

I know that, my cousin died 3 years ago, I miss him now as much as my recent loss of Nan, i know its bad to compare but I was so close, they were everything to me...now im just...Kaye *shrugs*
just kills me to think of memories cos i realise im the last one standing (literally) no1 else can give 2 fucks.

[~Wayne~]

I went through this recently, it hasn't gone away and doubt the pain ever will

[Tim]

the pain does get better but when sum1 reminds u of that person it comes back for a lil while

[Sponge'K'nob]

the pain NEVER goes..

[Luke]

the pain NEVER goes..

It does. Eventually.

[Tim]

i know i said it gets better. u can nev get rid of the pain of a death

[Sponge'K'nob]

no it doesnt.

[Luke]

no it doesnt.

It does though. The pain does go away. You never forget them but there becomes a point where you can think of them without crying or anything and just remember things they did.

[Brianna.]

It fades. Sometimes it comes back and kicks you square in the face, but it does fade. Trust me.

[Sponge'K'nob]

Thats where you are wrong.
My Grandad died 9 years n 4 months ago, my cousin died 3 years n 4 months ago.
I cry equally as much for them as i do my nan.

[Luke]

Thats where you are wrong.
My Grandad died 9 years n 4 months ago, my cousin died 3 years n 4 months ago.
I cry equally as much for them as i do my nan.

I'm not wrong. Just because you might still feel it, other people might not.

[Sponge'K'nob]

I'm not wrong. Just because you might still feel it, other people might not.
exactly i feel it...so the pain never goes.
so for me you are wrong deareh

[Brianna.]

Darlin', you're not the only one who's lost.

I've lost my Stepsister, both my grandfathers, a few friends, an aunt...I know what it's like.

You control how you feel about it. If you constantly mope about then you're not doing yourself any good. Think of what they'd want you to do...get on with your day.

[~Wayne~]

Point is it DOESN't go away, it may subside but it will never fully go.

[Brianna.]

I'm not saying it'll dissapear. It gets really hard when the anniverseries of their deaths roll around, especially my step-sisters....but it gets easier.

[me1]

What a wanker.

well said.

Ive had a death quite recently. It's my uncles funeral today yet im sittin here piggin out feelin sorrry for him. I would have gone to the funeral but its too far to go and my step parents wouldnt take me.

It wasnt till my real grandma died till i really could cope with death, she was the closest family member i had and she always looked after me, she was nothing but kind, she didnt have a bad bone in her. She never drank and hated smoking yet she died of cancer 3 years ago. I tried to kill myself, and thats when i realised that so many people in my family have died but this is the one time i wantd to die because of it and i thought wats the point in me dyin aswell, it's just one more funeral to go to.

The funeral starts in about half and hour and im gonna feel like shit the whole time because i cant say goodbye to my uncle.

[me1]

Point is it DOESN't go away, it may subside but it will never fully go.

If it fully goes then you wont have really loved the person. The people you'll remember for your whole lives are the ones you truely loved.

[Fairy]

As shane said peeple greeve differntly .I cry my eyes out!:( Like wen my dog died i cried for a whole day.I can't bottle it all up i wood crack up.

[Lindsay]

the pain will always be there, but it does subside a little. But you're going to be sad about it forever really.

[me1]

Death, and the pain that comes with it, is the only thing that lasts forever. I think its partly why people are so afraid of it.

[Sponge'K'nob]

If it fully goes then you wont have really loved the person. The people you'll remember for your whole lives are the ones you truely loved.

exactly

[me1]

thank you :) glad you agree.

[KiKiDee]

my mum once went to the doctors n sed the best way of young children (i know ur a teen) is to get a pet, and it prepares them for when humans die. en my gr8 gran passed away all i did was cry and eat!! but it does get easier!

[nanseea]

just think about how they would feel if they saw you dealing w/ all your crap and how they'd want you to smile <3 and smiel ! :D